On fear, letting go, and taking care (aka Fresh Boobs a comin!) - When I Grow Up

On fear, letting go, and taking care (aka Fresh Boobs a comin!) - When I Grow Up Always Remember by Dazey Chic On Wednesday of this week, Ill be going in for my Fresh Boobs (which is what Luke calls my bilateral mastectomy + reconstruction surgery). It was supposed to be on May 30th, but I got a call last week that said, Were moving it up! I didnt even know that could happen, but I did the rescheduling dance with some calls and clients, cleared my schedule almost completely, and freaked a bit about How Much There Is To Do and All The Loose Ends That Need To Be Tied Up. But really? After coordinating with my Virtual Wizard, Arwyn whos taking over loading blog posts and newsletter content, thankyoubabyJesus I took a look at What Had To Get Done and, really, its writing newsletters and blog posts in advance. And when I look at it from afar, if there are 2 blog posts that go up one week instead of 3, will it  really matter? And if I miss a week with the newsletterwill I have to go back to Corporate America? No. No I wont. Whats important, then? Taking care. Letting go. Getting better. Feeling good. Trusting my support system. Over the next few weeks, thats my main job. I wont lie about being really scared of this huge surgery Im having (Ill be under for something like 4 hours) enough so that Ive had to take anti-anxiety meds to fall asleep lately and all the pain I figure Im gonna be in (enough that theyre gonna give me an epidural pre-surgery to keep it at a minimum when I wake up. Blech!). As you might imagine, Im not so great with being the patient, or feeling out of control, or, um, having a high threshold for pain (which is why the tattoo Ive wanted since I was 16 has yet to grace my body)so this is Big Time Scary, you guys. And no, I dont have it in me to write a ukulele song about it (yet). Ive scheduled my blog content for when I come back, and its all about making the most of a slow time, finding (and enforcing!) your boundaries, asking for (and accepting!) helpdo we sense a theme here? These are the things I know Im gonna (begrudgingly) learn, and I have a feeling theres gonna be a new perspective here once I feel well enough to tear myself away from 12-hour marathons of  Friday Night Lights on my Kindle Fire in bed. If youre wondering how Im doing during/after surgery, my lovely husband will have my phone to Facebook/tweet how Im holding up. You can follow me on Twitter here and Like my Facebook page here to get the latest. So, Ill see ya on the flip side, but make sure you continue to come back regularly since I have a half-dozen amazeballs guest bloggers my regular features all ready for ya as per usual.  See? Im making sure to take care of you now, so I can take care of me later. Im already learning, begrudgingly or not.